me.... thinking again

I have a longing to become a more impulsive person. I long for the wild abandon of going wherever my heart is headed. My good friend Dawn has decided to take a leave of absence from her job at the high school *she is a special ed aide* and spend the next few months working for FEMA... first hauling campers from Ohio to Louisiana and Mississippi... then whatever comes next. She just reached the hurricane zone for the first time. There are no cell phone towers anymore there, so it will be a couple days before I know just what is going on with her... when she starts heading north again... but until then I can't help but wonder at the devastation she must be seeing and experiencing... how isolated and cut off the people there must feel... I feel so weird since I can't call her on the phone!! Imagine living there!

I want SO badly to be there too. I think that there is a part of me that is not too far under the surface that still longs for places unseen by those around me, a place that longs to help those who are hurting and troubled, a place that still yearns to be "out there"... my heart desperately longs to be GOING... but God has me here for this season... a season when He is teaching me much about the woman that He desires me to be... as much as I long to be THERE.... it is important to be HERE. The interesting thing is that so many people are "refined by the fire" when they are in the midst of the battle... I am perhaps, a freak! I believe that God is doing His biggest refining job of my character, my life, my discipline, my very being on a much smaller and common battlefield that lies on these normal old Ohio streets... that He is teaching me patience in waiting on his perfect timing, but more importantly that He is teaching me that life is about GIVING and not just about ADVENTURES... that as much as I long to be an adventurer, I have much to learn before I can truly GIVE myself to His service *and the GIving is far better and more meaningful than the adventuring... that the amount that I have to learn about truly being a disciple is bigger than what I can possibly imagine... and I am learning. I just may have LD!

**No worries though... still longing to visit distant lands for adventures... anyone wanna come?